RED

My mom loved the color RED. Every morning she would be ready in a red saree with a red tika. No matter what she wore, she always had a touch of color red in her attire.

One day, all of a sudden this color vanished from her life. It went away with my father’s soul.

She had adorned the color all her life and then all of a sudden it was something that was not acceptable for her to adorn. The pain of losing her better half was and would always be there, however, the absence of RED was always there to remind her of his absence. Probably seeing her in white is the most bitter thing I remember. Until then, I had never ever realized the impact a color could have in a person’s life. My mom would dread to go out in the public with the white attire for a year as just a glance of it would bring in several sad questions for her to answer. This brought a constant feeling of loneliness and grief in my mom’s life. RED has left her life a few years back. The color might not bother her anymore, but ever since, I have hated the color RED.

A year back one of my uncles in his Forty’s lost his wife, my aunt. For sure his life wouldn’t be the same as it was when he was with my aunt. However, no one could tell him that he was a widower just with his attire. After a year he got married again. It is a normal practice in our society. The widower’s life moves on. However, a widow’s life stops. It gets stuck behind faded colors. Even colors halt in life, no question of a life moving.

I have tried to change my mom but failed to do so. However, it’s not just my mom who fears the change. Every woman who has lost their other half have this fear inside. And the selfish society bitterly criticizes those who have the courage to change themselves. And I get a feeling of anger and disgust when women themselves are the ones who criticize the brave move of these single women.

Some people are tempted to teach cultural values and preaching about the sin of adorning red by a single woman. I request them to either drain all the red blood that flows through the single women from their body parts or admit that it’s a sin and foolishness to depart a creature who is born red from RED.

Now I have been married for nearly two years. I try to boycott this color as much as I can with a hope and effort that someday the society would change and red would not stand as a symbol just for married women. I have received complaints about not being in red, I have been requested to wear red, requested to look married, criticized for trying to act modern and also been requested not to make a fuss on this very small matter and instead wear Red for everyone’s internal satisfaction. However, I refuse to admit that this is a small matter. The pain the color RED can bring to a woman’s life is overlooked.

RED is a color of Blood and Love, which is inseparable from any creature. Don’t make RED stand as a color of Difference, let it symbolize Love and Power!

WTF!!!

Lately, I got an opportunity to teach Bachelors level students in an academic institute. As this was my first teaching experience, I was very excited but nervous at the same time. I was supposed to take classes in the fourth and sixth semester. I was asked to take two classes back to back, one class each day a week (for the fourth semester) and the other class only for three days a week, Wednesday to Friday (for the sixth semester). The good thing about taking up teaching would be that I would be forced to get up in the mornings, as the classes would start early at 6:30 am. The sad part would be that I would miss the cozy sleep during morning time.

Finally, the day came when I went to the college for the first time to teach. On the first day, I was introduced to other teachers and members of the management team. Then I was given two files to take the attendance of the students. The files were made of Nepali paper with attendance sheet punched and placed inside. My name was written on the cover of each of the files along with some other details about the subjects that I taught. I just gave a quick glance to the information on the cover of the files, grabbed the files and moved to the class where I was guided by the coordinator. The coordinator introduced me to the students and handed the class to me. There were mischievous faces of students, all gazing at me, maybe because I was a new teacher there. I quickly tripped down my memory lane to a time where I used to be a student. I remembered how some naughty boys in class would already coin a nickname for the teacher on the very first meeting based on the teacher’s appearance and use it as a code word to talk among friends for the rest of their lives. I then wondered what would these kids call me while they talked about me among themselves.

The first class was just about the introduction. I introduced myself to the students and they introduced themselves to me. Then we talked about the course content. By the end of the first class, I was already feeling like I have been teaching for long. Then I took the second class, where the students were in the last semester i.e. 6th semester. As they were in the last semester, they were much laid back type. They had the attitude of college seniors. Most of them didn’t even appear on the first day. Nevertheless, the first experience was great.

From the next day onwards I started preparing slides, seeing lessons in YouTube and exploring the internet thoroughly to make sure that I would be giving the best examples to the students and the students would enjoy the class. So for the next 5 days, the only thing that was in my mind was ‘Teaching’. The students did seem to enjoy my class. I used to take frequent feedback from them and used to ask if I need to change my teaching methodology. The students in the fourth semester were quite active. However, I noticed that few students in the final semester were more into making noise. As a remedy to making noise, I used to ask questions to those who made noise in class.

One fine morning, I reached the college a bit early. The students hadn’t arrived. I grabbed the attendance files from the staff room. The files were kept in separate piles, for each stream. After taking the files, I went to the admin room, waited for a while, for the students to come. I started reading the information that had been written on the cover of one of the files given to me….

Bhubi Bista
BHM 6th Sem
Strategic Management
(WTF Period)

My eyes wide opened.

WTF?

There were some lines below, but I couldn’t go below. My eyes stuck on that word.
All of a sudden, my mind became clouded. I stressed hard to think who could have written that. Once again I hopped to my memory lane, back to a time when I used to attend similar classes and some students used to mock the teachers by doing various embarrassing activities. I became sure that it was one of my students who wrote that. But the students seemed to be enjoying my classes and neither of them seemed to be so troublesome. Again, the handwriting seemed similar throughout the cover of the file. The handwriting for the word ‘WTF’ was no different than the handwriting with which my name and subject were written. But it would be stupid to guess that someone from the management or admin team had written that word in my file. I saw the other attendance file given to me. There was nothing written there besides my name and class information. So, I became sure that one of my students should have written that, maybe because I was asking them too many questions for making noise. My mind started thinking 100 of things. I just couldn’t think anymore.

It was time for me to go to the class. I tried to take the first class normally. However, when I went to the second class, my eyes rolled around each student present in the class to guess who might have written that. I had my doubt on the last benchers because I used to ask them a lot of questions for making noise. But, had I ever left my file in the class? No, I was sure that I hadn’t. Maybe one of the students got hold of the file later and wrote that.

Even when I was giving the lecture, my mind was trying to sense a clue on who wrote the word.

I wasn’t delivering the same energy that day that I used to deliver in the previous classes. I tried not to give extra information, nothing besides the course content that day. I presumed they wouldn’t be liking it. So, I wrapped up my lecture early. I still had so many things in mind. The day had already turned as a bad day for me. Until the day before, I was so excited about teaching. Suddenly everything seemed gloomy. I felt really bad.

I went to the staff room again, to place the files from the place where I had collected the files. There were other attendance files there, for classes that would probably be on the second half or next day. I flipped through other files that were piled up, to see if the students disliked other classes like mine and to see if they had written something on the other files.

I flipped one file just to find that there was information only about the teacher and the class timing. Then I flipped the second file. The file had the teacher’s and subject’s name and then something was written in a similar handwriting as in my file with the characters ‘(ST period)’. I wondered what ST meant. It probably meant something stupid. I flipped through the other files. I realized that in some files, only the required information was there. However, in some files, there was another line with words like ‘TF period’, ‘STF period’ and so on. But none of the files had WTF. I became more curious. Who was writing this? Again, the handwriting exactly matched with that who had written other information in those files. Unable to handle my curiosity, I took a file with a word written “SWT Period” to the admin room and asked the administrator if he knew what the words meant. The administrator replied casually – “The classes will be on Sundays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, so it is the short form for Sunday, Wednesday and Thursday”.

Jesus! I was expecting something very nasty.

My eyes rolled down to my own file after hearing that. The meaning was clear. So his statement suggested that WTF period meant classes on Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays!!

I went to the admin room back with the files. I sat there alone for some time and remembered a story that I had read during my school days whose title was “Doshi Chasma”. I felt like the main character of that story, where the protagonist would think and overthink about an event that didn’t actually happen. I was making a fuss about nothing.

Though I felt extremely dumb, I got an important lesson from this experience. Your thoughts on what others think might not always hold true. If I hadn’t known the truth that day, maybe my teaching experience would have turned negative for me even when nothing had actually happened in reality. I had already declined my performance for the day because of my negative thoughts. Even if I hadn’t known the truth that day, I should have been able to accept things normally and I should have continued my classes with the same enthusiasm that I had before the incident took place. I realized that most of the stress in life comes from the way we respond, not the way life is. All we need to do is adjust our attitude towards the problem and all that extra problem and stress is gone. Once we replace negative thoughts with positive, we will start getting positive results like I did in my classes later.

Ever since the event took place, the meaning for the acronym WTF has changed for me. There are no negative words, just negative thoughts! I have started keeping my face to the Sunshine so that I don’t see a Shadow.

How to backup iphone contacts to Google Drive

There are many ways to backup your iPhone contacts. However, here I am going to talk about syncing the contacts to Google Drive. I am mentioning this technique because while transferring my contacts, I found that contact back up through Google Drive is the easiest method.

Step 1:
Install Google Drive App on your iPhone

Step 2:
Open the Drive. In the top left, tap Menu. Go to Settings and tap the Backup option.

Step 3
START BACK UP. A dialogue box appears asking if you want Drive to Access your contacts. Tap ‘Ok’.

Just in few minutes, your Backup is complete.

 

Picture Perfect

It was 5:30 pm, time to head home from office.

I got on my ride. It was too dusty outside, so I wore my yellow framed sunglasses although it was dark outside. I drapped my neck with a thick muffler and I imagined I looked like Lord Shiva with snake drapped around the neck. I smiled to myself.  Just when i sat on the cold seat of my scooter which was wet with fog, I remembered my warm cozy bed  waiting for me at home. I couldn’t wait any longer. So I started for home.

Everytime I get into the street, I get a feeling that i am participating in a competition, where all the vehicles in the streets are my competitors and I have to struggle to reach home which is at a distance of 11kms from my office.

The journey to my home seems so far due to the traffic jam in several places that I can almost think about the entire universe at this time. My mind usually is in a different world while my body and my ride will be struggling hard to compete with all other bigger, fatter or smaller rides.

Just as I had reached half way to my home, I came across a bad traffic jam. People were saying it was because of some political protest that took place some time ago in that particular area. I cursed all the protestors for making things so difficult for general public and just waited for the traffic jam to clear. Just then my eyes caught an enormous building to my right. “When did such a big building emerge here? “, I murmured to myself in astonishment because I had never noticed that building in that area earlier. Now,  I had to pass my time doing something, so I started counting the stories of the building from bottom to top. As I had finished counting the 7th floor, I got a chill down my spine with a thought, “What if an earthquake came just at this moment? This building would turn me into a pickle”.  Well, this feeling is something that haunts me every time I come across a place with many buildings or multistoried buildings.Again suppresing this scary imagination,  I continued counting the floors and just when I reached the top floor , i.e, the 11th floor, I saw a huge  shining body above the building.

That glance brought a soothing effect to my mind and heart. It was the moon, but it looked so different than ever before. It was a full moon , round cheeked, and golden in color. Omg, i had never seen such beautiful thing before!

Suddenly the traffic jam cleared, and I had to move on. But my eyes were stuck on the prettiest moon ever. I just followed the moon this time. It appeared just in front of me , in every route I took.

The moon had till then captivated my heart. The darker the sky, the brighter it shone. I started admiring the universe. I wanted to stop somewhere and take a picture of the glowing object, the golden moon. But then the traffic police could appear out of nowhere to seize my license for stopping just anywhere. And again, even if I did, the moon would look really small with my mobile phone’s camera. Even the DSLR that I had at home wasn’t that powerful. Hopefully, I thought, I should at-least be able to make some use of the lens that day. Uff, how i wished I had a powerful camera then. I then got another thought of saving some money and gifting myself a good camera.

As i moved forward,  i just pitied people who were in their own busy world, ignoring such a magical thing. Why weren’t others seeing this supernatural moon? The people have forgotten to enjoy natural beauty. Uff! Such a pity!

For a second I thought I would write a status in my facebook and alarm all my facebook friends to see the moon but for that I had to reach home.

“Just some time to get home and I will hurry myself to the terrace and watch the moon the whole night and even take pictures with whatever low photography skills that I have”, I promised myself.

Finally I reached home, and I hurried up myself through the stairs after  grabbing the camera that lay on my table.

Without even exchanging glance with anyone at home, I reached the terrace. The moon was just there, shining bright , so close to me. I brought the camera close to my eyes, closed my left eye to give a sharp look while I peeked through the lens with another eye.

But!

But, there was an obstruction in between.  I realised they were my glasses. I didn’t take a second to remove it off and kept it on the railing next to me and then got myself ready for the perfect shot. But! Alas!

When I looked up, with naked eyes,  the moon wasn’t golden anymore. It was just the normal moon I saw every night. I got a strong jerk on my mind. My pressure went up.

All this time  I had been seeing the moon golden and unnatural because of the sunglasses that I had been wearing through out the time. I cursed myself for being so stupid that I didn’t realize i was being fooled by those glasses. I had never felt so doltish before!

However, I  did click a picture of the moon that day. But whenever i see that picture now, I make sure I put on the same sunglasses to make it Picture- Perfect.  Then I get a big grin on my face 😀

 

 

Nepal- Coolest Place To Travel On Earth

‘What do you have in your wish list for 2016?’ The most common answer that we have heard for this question is ‘Travelling to New Places’ . With the year end, National Geographic Traveler has released its coolest destination list for 2016, with Nepal ranked as one of the top 16 coolest and must visit places on Earth.

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Photo By: Jack Brauer

Nepal, a small landlocked country, situated between two giants- India and China, is a land of Diversities. You will find the deepest gorge to the highest mountains here in Nepal. The friendly and welcoming nature of Nepalese people will definitely want to make you stay longer in this country.Barun Valley

Photo By: Dhilung Kirat

The devastating earthquake of April 2015 had deteriorated the tourism industry in this himalayan kingdom. But the beautiful place is yet again safe to visit and has made a comeback in International Tourism.

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Source: National Geographic

Once in your lifetime, you would definitely want to see the snow clad mountains, take a ride in the wild forests, see the rare animal species, visit the temples/monasteries listed under world heritage, visit the lakes situated in the highest altitude , make a wild bungee jump, paraglide over the eye catching mountains, watch a cool waterfall and if you are determined enough, conquer the highest peak in the world- Mt. Everest.

Upper Mustang

Photo By: Ravin Man Bajracharya

If you are an adventure lover and go gaga over naturally beautiful places, Nepal is a place you should definitely visit. Pack your bags and start your new year by visiting this exotic place and the memories will be enough to keep you refreshed throughout the year.

Everest Region

Source: tumblr.com

Kukur Tihar: A day when Dogs are worshipped

Tihar is one of the biggest festivals of Nepal celebrated by the Hindus. This festival is celebrated for five days, focusing on the relationship of human with different creatures and God.

The second day of Tihar is an interesting one, the day in which dogs are worshiped and honored. Dogs are considered to be loyal friend of humans. But this is not the only reason why they are worshiped on this day. The reason behind worshiping dogs during Tihar has some historical reasons and significance too.

Source: Bhakti Rasayana

According to Rigveda, a sacred book on Hinduism, Samara (the mother of dogs) had assisted Indra ( The Lord of heaven) in retrieving stolen cattle.

According to another hindu mythology dogs are considered as the messenger of Lord Yamraj, the God of Death.  A dog is also said to guard the gates of the afterlife.

Source: theodysseyonline.com

On the day of Kukur Tihar, people offer mala (garland made of flowers) , tika (sacred colored powder) and delicious food to the dogs. People cherish the strong bond between humans and dogs on this day.

Source: rupakkhadka.com

Not many would know the mythological reason behind celebrating this festival. However, these days people give more importance to this festival because of the relationship they have with their favorite pet.  Those who do not have a pet at home go in search of stray dogs and put garlands and tika to them. Even the dogs are excited when they are offered delicious food early in the morning but until the day end, they are so much pampered and obsessed with food that they don’t  give a glance even to their favorite food.

Pic By: Satish Sharma

So how are you pampering your dog today? And how are you celebrating this festival? Do share!

A Journey Which I could Relate to the Situation of My Nation

I was quite excited to go for my second hiking with my office colleagues . However, the route was the same which I had traveled to in my first hike i.e Shivapuri to Sundarijal. I had been to this place when I was in my 10th grade i.e. nearly a decade ago. Though we had plans to go for a night stay in some resorts, because of petrol crisis it was difficult for us to reserve a vehicle for an entire day. Thus, we  planned a hiking program instead.

I would like to give a brief description about my experience. The hiking area  was just some kilometers away from the place I was staying i.e. Kathmandu but the entire journey for me was as hard as conquering Everest. It was obvious that being a conservation area , there would be no shops, no roads, no transport. However, even after coming out from the area, the situation was same. There were houses high up in the hills, similar to what I used to draw during my childhood; the houses that fascinated me then, but I now know they have nothing inside them, not even the basic necessities( here I am referring to internet and other facilities people of city areas can’t live without) . Walking for nearly 6 hours had my feet swollen and I needed to walk 6 more hours to reach my destination. I couldn’t walk at all. A friend took my hands by his to support me throughout the way. I had another big stick to support me in another hand. But I still could hardly walk.

It was getting dark and some of my friends informed that they had already reached Sundarijal dam while we were still wandering in the jungle area of Shivapuri. We were 4 of us walking in the dark when we realised we had lost our way. We tried to contact our friends but there was no mobile network. We tried to  take help of GPS but all in vain. We were extremely confident that the GPS would help us through out our way. I realised how dependent we were on our devices that without them we couldn’t do anything- just wander impatiently.  Somehow after walking  for sometime the mobile network appeared and we could communicate with our friends who had reached the dam and thus we found our way.

When we finally reached Sundarijal, just two hours from the main bus stop area, it was totally dark. There were no shops. The moon light was dim and not enough to show us our way. So,we opened our mobile lights to make our paths clear. The way was a steep downhill where we met a man, may be in his 50s carrying a huge pile of firewood in his back. My jaws dropped when I saw him walking so easily on such a difficult terrain. We asked him, how much more time would it take to reach us the main chowk. He clearly said- ” Baini, it actually takes us an hour but your speed will surely take you 3 hours!!” That moment I had a shame on my face, not because i couldn’t walk. Seeing the pile of firewoods double than his own weight made me realise, how people just few kilometers away from our main city were living. And they have been living in the same way throughout their life. They have been using firewood to cook their food throughout their lives. They have been always running and walking barefooted in those difficult terrain. They have never had access to transportation so easily. They do not have access to good medical services and supplies unless they come to the city area. They have to come to the city to buy their basic needs. They do not have good schools, good college, good hospitals and infrastructures. They do not have smartphones like we do, to guide them through their way. Their life was and has been the same. They have not been affected with economic blockade like we have just because they were always differentiated by the government  because they do not live in Kathmandu. What surprised me more is that it was an area which was not even considered very remote- just wondering what would be the condition in a place like Accham and Bajura.

By mentioning the above I do not mean to prove that we can live even with economic blockade. It will be a nightmare for both the people living in cities as well as the rural areas. However, when we were in a position to develop our country, we never thought of people living in other parts of Nepal. The media only covers the difficulties of the people living in the city areas. Is it just because we the people living in city areas are used to see them that way?

We have been facing scarcities here in Kathmandu and I guess that is the only reason why I can see the difficulties the man with the heavy load had been facing. Else, I am sure I would not have even given a second glance to the man who walks such difficult terrain everyday to suffice his living. I would not have given a second thought to what would he do with collecting and carrying such a heavy pile of firewood every day.

It is only when the people in city areas are suffering, they are sending these trouble stories to the entire world. May be many of my concept and thoughts on this topic may not be convincing for all, but it is a true fact that more than 50% of Nepalese have been living this life ever since they have been born.

I remember laughing  at my mom’s words (some years back) when she told me that some people in the rural parts of our hometown, Darchula haven’t seen a mirror their entire life . This was like a joke to me then. But I am slowly realizing, the day is not far that even I will be able to see things on internet but not in reality (If blockade continues) . It wasn’t a joke then! I was blindfolded and saw things only from my perception.

6 Things Women Who Celebrate Teej Can Relate To

The country is going bright once again with women clad in their all time favorite color –Red. Haritalika teej or Teej is a festival celebrated by women to mark the union of goddess Parvati with Lord Shiva. This festival is observed for marital happiness and well being of family members. Though people from other cultural backgrounds think it’s really hard for women who celebrate teej because of the difficult fasting ritual the festival holds  , it is actually a festival women enjoy celebrating.

Listed are six things every woman who celebrates Teej loves about it.

Fun with Dar

Having Dar before the tough fasting day has its own charm. Moreover, meeting friends and relatives who are sharing similar experiences is what adds to the charm of the festival. We might have delicious food before and after, but Daar always has a special significance to women celebrating teej.

Buying and Gifting Accessories

Buying and exchanging accessories is another important part of teej. We love to embellish ourselves as well our experience sharers with beautiful accessories on this day. So our teej shopping starts a month before and sometimes even before that. After all, shopping is an art and women are masters in this art!

Unveiling the Best Traditional Look

This is the day we dress up in our best traditional attire. We might not step out of our houses but still we prefer to look our very best. Unmarried girls usually prefer red kurtas while most married women are seen in beautiful red sarees and a green tilhari that fully complements their attire.

Strict Fasting on Own Will

No matter what belief we have throughout the year about staying hungry, we love to fast on this day of the year. Some women fast without having a single drop of water while some spend the day with fruits and other pious edibles. We give up our meals for our family especially for the wellness of our husband and in return we get self satisfaction and peace of mind.

Visiting Temples 

Women queue up from midnight in Lord Shiva’s temples just to get a glimpse of Lord Shiva on this day. Most of the time women have to queue up for an entire day to keep their wishes in front of Lord Shiva. No matter how great the hardship, teej is never complete without visiting Shiva ji’s temples.

Dancing With Heart

No food to burn calories, no water to trench the thirst, yet we always have that unmatchable energy to dance our heart out on this day. This is the only day when even our mom and aunts dance like nobody’s watching and it gives us immense pleasure to watch them pour all their sorrows and happiness through their dances.

Good Deeds Through Social Media For The Lazy Ones!

The world has become quite an easy place to live in because these days we can do everything via social media- including helping poor children of developing countries, physically challenged people, war wounded soldiers and what not! Yet- it’s a different thing that we do all these virtually.

poorI have been tagged in many pictures of god and goddesses by my friends in Facebook . I would be more than happy to be tagged in such pictures if only they did not have these lines on them – “Like karo warna…”,…… “Do not close without liking or sharing or you will invite badluck”  and so on. And no doubt, I see thousands of likes, shares and comments on those pictures. It’s sure that people have done it because of the words written on those pictures. Facebook is now not just a place for social interaction but a place for worshipping god and purifying your soul through likes, helping poor through comments, praying for physically challenged through shares.

The thing that surprises me is how can a like on facebook give you good news, make your future good or avoid bad things to happen in your life? What do people think? Those posters of gods and goddesses are from heaven and the lines written on them by messengers of God? Why are we forgetting that facebook is made by Mark Zukerberg, a simple , normal human being. Have we gone so crazy with social media that we have started believing that likes and comments on social media is what shapes our future?

Lately I see all our good works have to be made visible in social media. If it is not, we have lost track or record of our own deeds. Not to mention the fact that others wouldn’t know about our great deeds at all if it’s not shared on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

A picture of an extremely poor child stricken with hunger and poverty circulates all over fb with the message, “A beautiful girl’s picture is liked by everyone, can I get a like too?” And , we fools from facebook, we like and comment on the picture as if the child has designed his picture himself and asking for love by posting his own picture on facebook. In reality, he will be the child, who has probably not even heard of Facebook ever. And here goes another post- “Don’t skip this pic if you love your mother!” Really? Now, we measure our love for our mom through Facebook’s post?

Facebook or other social media can be an extremely useful medium to share authentic information, but if all people start getting fooled by simple posts on social media, we are sure to have a pathetic future, dependent highly on social media information rather than factual information. It’s high time we filter our own posts and know where and how are we wasting our precious time. We are learning to help and work virtually and the outcomes are virtual too!

poor1

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